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summons? I, for instance, am but dust and ashes. With St. Paul, I
acknowledge myself the chiefest of sinners; but I do not suffer this
sense of my personal vileness to daunt me. I know my Leader: that He
is just as well as mighty; and while He has chosen a feeble instrument
to perform a great task, He will, from the boundless stores of His
providence, supply the inadequacy of the means to the end. Think
like me, Jane- trust like me. It is the Rock of Ages I ask you to lean
on: do not doubt but it will bear the weight of your human weakness.'
'I do not understand a missionary life: I have never studied
missionary labours.'
'There I, humble as I am, can give you the aid you want: I can
set you your task from hour to hour; stand by you always; help you
from moment to moment. This I could do in the beginning: soon (for I
know your powers) you would be as strong and apt as myself, and
would not require my help.'
'But my powers- where are they for this undertaking? I do not
feel them. Nothing speaks or stirs in me while you talk. I am sensible
of no light kindling- no life quickening- no voice counselling or
cheering. Oh, I wish I could make you see how much my mind is at
this moment like a rayless dungeon, with one shrinking fear fettered
in its depths- the fear of being persuaded by you to attempt what